Trend of Entitlement

My husband and I decided we would like to visit a neighboring city on a recent vacation.  The city we were vacationing in offered public transportation as a way to get from point “A” to point “B”.  Being from a small town, certain things are not available and public transportation is one of them.   I had NO idea what to expect and I had NO preconceived ideas.  However, with my personality I immediately said, “lets take the bus, it will be fun”.

Fun was definitely an overstatement!  For the next 2 hours, I watched as people from all walks of life stepped on and off a bus (which by the way made 20 stops between point “A” and “B”).   We met many by name and even learned what had brought them to this place.  Several were immigrants working at local hotels and this was their only means of transportation. One was a loud, obnoxious man upset that the air-conditioning on the bus wasn’t working to his standards and stated on more than one occasion, “The driver on the previous bus was not “personable” enough”.   

However, my favorite was a widow lady on her monthly trip to the local Walmart to be the first to get the day -old cakes marked down after 2pm. You would have thought it was a prized possession.

I left that little adventure realizing that the feeling of entitlement doesn’t necessarily come as a result of “income” or the lack of it. Some on that bus felt it was the government’s responsibility to provide them transportation while others were just glad to have a ride.

Now I admit raising my kids in a small town might have had its advantages.  I don’t remember explaining to my kids why they couldn’t have the brand new truck or the most expensive pocketbook or shoes.  I worked hard to make sure they had things they needed and tried hard to give them things they wanted, but I never wanted them to feel entitled to anything.

Was I overzealous in giving in to wants versus needs?  Did I tell them the truth, that sometimes it was hard to pay the light bill?  Did I teach them how to appreciate small things because I saw my own parents struggle?

I honestly don’t know.  But I am certain I see a trend that some feel entitled to things.  I am also determined to make sure I teach my grandchildren the value of a dollar and to remind them that hard work never hurt anyone.  But most of all appreciate the small things and always be grateful for the ride. 

I don't do Mornings!

I don’t do mornings!

It is rare for me to see the sun come up.  It’s also rare for me not to watch the 10pm news on WFXL and even see the opening monologue of The Tonight Show with Jimmy Fallen. I guess you could say I am somewhat of a night owl.   I simply don’t love mornings! Now that is not to say that I can’t get up and get going when needed…I just don’t want to!!

Now, I do believe it was Benjamin Franklin who penned “Early to bed and early to rise… helps make a man healthy, wealthy and wise”.

So the question is “do we make better decisions in the morning, in particular “financial” decisions”?  For most Americans only two other things, family and health, are more important than financial decisions.

I have been told that “decision fatigue” referring to the results from being inundated with decisions all day long contributes to making poor decisions later in the day.

Well…what if you simply can’t perform some task until at least 10am?  What if your mind doesn't even start clicking until mid-morning?  Does that make you less likely to make sound decisions?

I don’t think so, and I have figured out that I have been blessed with what will soon be 18,250 mornings.  Now granted I have made some really stupid decisions, and a few have been financial ones; however, I have also experienced some very sound decisions.

Therefore, the only thing I am sure of is that every decision has consequences and everything just makes more since after a good cup of coffee!  Let me know what you think! 

Life Happens

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Most jobs do not have just one specific trait. For example: a chef must possess creativity and good organizational skills….not just be a great cook!   A banker is no exception.  When dealing with ones finances, the banker must be a great communicator as well as possess strong mathematical skills and even provide the time and date on some occasions.  LOL

However, among many other traits, one of the most crucial traits for a banker is empathy.  To put it simply, we need to have the capacity to feel what our customer feels.

This became more evident to me recently, when several individuals dear to my heart visited me.  All of these young people come from similar backgrounds but through choices and circumstances each took a very different path.

Two young men came to visit my office with financial questions. While one chose college (not an easy path), the other decided he would wait and work for a while in the family business, putting off continuing his education.  The third was a young lady who had been through a pivotal and emotional week celebrating the life of a special young man known to us all.  The impact that he had on her life gave her a determination to succeed no matter what.

As my family and I begin to celebrate what is traditionally known as Holy Week, I started to ponder how events in our lives impact our financial decisions now and in the future.  I realized a good banker must look at each “transaction” with the capacity to feel what the other person feels and not just from an analytical perspective or from a debt to income ratio.  I knew each young person personally, their families, and “oh the possibilities” in each one. Seeing more than the numbers gave me a heartfelt answer for each of them.  And that is “Community Banking At Its Best”! 

If Time Is Money...

My mother always said, “Time is money”!  So, if that is true, I set out to determine how many hours of work it took me to earn that new cashmere coat I bought on my recent trip to Ireland!

By now the charge has hit my credit card and the reality of the purchase has sunk in.  That beautiful red, coat/wrap that was so soft and beautiful in cold Ireland, doesn’t seem to have quite the pizazz in good ole’ south GA.   I recently read that we should think of all purchases in terms of how long you had to work to buy it.

Now, I can pretty much tell you to the penny how much per hour that I earn.  But no, I don’t care to share that bit of information with you.  However, I can give you a shortcut to figure it out what that REALLY AWESOME RED CASHMERE COAT could have cost me in work hours by taking the amount of money you earn in thousands per year and drop off the last three zeroes. Then divide by two. So, if I earn $60,000 (haha), it becomes $60, divided by two is $30. So, if I earn $30 per hour, that REALLY AWESOME RED CASHMERE COAT cost me 5 hours of hard, mind-altering, work.  Was it worth it? Well, let’s just say I have an entirely new perspective on just how much looking good REALLY COST!!

$4 Latte Makes Me Smile

“I wonder how much money have I spent on $4 lattes this past year and is it irresponsible?”

Now my train-of-thought of course is, I’m almost 50-years-old and I have worked since I was 15 and I LOVE a pumpkin spiced latte and frankly I deserve it (right?).

Well do I?  So, I am setting out to conquer a New Year’s resolution of participating in all the things in life I find exciting and saying No to some things that frankly don’t excite me!  I recently read an article recommending setting up a “thoughtful spending plan”.  The article stated, “there is nothing wrong with spending money on things that are important to you, as long as you consider two things: 1) ask yourself if you have the money to begin with and 2) cut your spending on things that, quite frankly, don’t make you too excited”. Sounds easy, right? 

The challenge is many times during the year I participate in things because of a self-imposed feeling of obligation.  I don’t want to say NO! 

Here’s a great example. Smoked Boston-butts are really not our thing!  However, many organizations in our community sell these as fundraisers.  So what do I do?  I spend $25- $30 on something, that frankly my husband and I don’t like and 9 out of 10 times wind-up throwing most of it away. Do you know how many lattes I could have bought for $25?  A pumpkin spiced latte makes me happy, the Boston-butt on the other hand…well you get the picture.

Setting up a “thoughtful spending plan” doesn’t have to be hard!  All it takes is a few minutes to do some soul searching and evaluate your resources and what makes you tick.  Why not try it?  Throughout the approaching “love” month, see if you notice a pattern emerging of buying things that don’t make your heart smile, and adjust it.   

The point is to be intentional about spending money on things that give us value. If that $4 latte really makes you smile…go for it and enjoy every sip.

Christmas Eve Gift

It was a tradition I definitely was not accustomed to.   As soon as the clock struck 12:01am, on Christmas Eve, my husband’s grandmother would begin calling family members and simply saying “Christmas Eve Gift” which would be followed by a giggle and a thought of “Gotcha” before hanging up the phone.  After her passing, my husband felt it necessary to continue the tradition. 

Each year, he begins the lengthy task of preparing his list of numbers to make his annual “Christmas Eve Gift” calls then he sets his biological clock to get up way too early for me.  I now understand why some received calls at 4am…it takes that long to go down the list. 

Well guess what?  This year my husband got a new smart phone and the first thing our youngest daughter said was, “do you think we could just get a text this year”?  LOL!   I then said, “why do you think he does it”?, too which she replied, “It is just something that has stuck around. Some traditions are just that. No reason but it is there”.  WOW! 

As I began to set goals for the New Year the thought struck me,  “Am I doing things that have NO reason, can I do things differently, can I make sure what I do is effective?  The answer is simply YES!

So, on Christmas Eve, I took the time to help my “technologically challenged” husband set up a group message to go out at a certain time and... ALL OUR FAMILY WILL THANK ME LATER!

Happy New Year!  

Now What Were We Celebrating?

How can something so meaningful have everyone in such a tizzy?  Parties, parades, family get-togethers and, of course, there are the college bowl games… just to name a few. But how did it get to be so hectic? 

Maybe it is the “people pleaser” in all of us, or maybe just maybe the holidays really do bring out the “giving” in all of us.    There is something about this time of year that makes me a little more “giving”…giving of my time, talents and money.

My heart seems to yearn for my family and friends more. I cherish the time I spend with my husband enjoying the things he loves. I then get so stressed each year preparing for the annual Christmas parade, just to be consumed by the fun I have with my coworkers as we throw-out candy and wave as if we were kings and queens.

Then there are the parties!  You know the company party that NO one really wants to attend, but feels obligated to do so. Especially when the marketing director adds “tacky sweater” to the invite!  Oh and lets not forget the church dinner, the Christmas Cantata, play practice and then throw-in your parents 50^th wedding anniversary party, decorating the house, purchasing and wrapping the presents.

Shew, now what were we celebrating?  Oh yeah, the sweet Christ child that came with no parties or bowl games, just a lowly manger and one happy and blessed mother to have her little family in one little place. We could blame the Wise Men for the tizzy; after all, they started the gift giving. But then they were “wise” and maybe on to something!  You see, “giving” is part of who we are and what makes our homes, communities, churches and businesses so special.  So, enjoy the tizzy and remember to keep the spirit of Christ in your Christmas!